I used to be afraid to do things alone.
It was really kinda silly. I remember traveling and being afraid to eat at a restaurant alone.
What would people think? That I am a big fat loser that has no one to dine with?
So I would order room service versus checking out the highly recommended sushi place right down the street. And I love me some sushi!!
Or, I would find a grocery store and get some lunchmeat and a piece of fruit. Definitely not equivalent to sushi.
I remember once wanting to see a movie really, really bad but my husband at the time was like, “not a chance in hell”, and the usual conglomerate of girls were busy. He told me to just go alone.
I gasped! OMG, what would people think? That I am an even bigger AND fatter loser because I don't have someone to go to the movies with!
At first glance, it may appear that I was afraid of doing things alone.
However, it was really a fear of what people thought.
Why does this have such a strong hold on many of us?
One of the #1 reasons my clients say they don't follow through on something, or do something that lights them up, is because they are afraid of what their friends, family, and even strangers might think.
For some reason, we are led to believe that it matters what people think. That it is somehow the “thing” to do when making a decision - to GET PERMISSION from people around us.
(Just a note, there is a difference between being considerate and checking in on the thoughts and feelings of your spouse when making a big decision that would impact the whole family, for example, and feeling the need to get approval.)
I don't think there is a quick and magic solution to this as it requires a HUGE change in mindset to stop giving a crap.
There are, though, a few main “tools” or things that help me tremendously:
Around 40 I had an epiphany. I was way too old to give a fuck to worry about the thoughts and perceptions of others.
I believe this is just a natural progression of things. You wise up, and figure it out. This LIFE is too damn SHORT.
2. Knowing myself at soul-level was a total GAME CHANGER.
It gave me an insurmountable confidence that no other amount of knowledge ever had.
I finally understood how I operated best, and not needing to question that somehow gave me permission to just do ME.
3. Soul-level clearing.
When you free yourself from your negative karmic baggage, you feel lighter and things start to shift for you naturally. It really is magical.
4. Mindset work in combo with EFT.
Whenever I was triggered or found myself worrying about it, I would do some investigative mindset work and Tap around my thoughts and feelings. This got both my body and my brain on board.
If your spirit wants to soar, and you have BIG plans for yourself but are afraid of taking action because of what others think, I invite you to join me for a true CONFIDENCE building experience!