When people finally get tired of always feeling anxious and tense, they tend to lean on what they know to get rid of it.
There are plenty of great ideas out there. If you have asked others ”why am I always anxious for no reason?”, and shared that you are sick of feeling nervous or sad, I’m sure you’ve gotten a ton of advice.
And as someone with a psychotherapy background, I have extensive experience with the more “traditional” solutions such as exploring beliefs/events that could be triggering anxiety, processing emotions, mindfulness exercises, and breathing techniques. Sure, these interventions worked a little, but it took a long, long time for my clients to make such small gains.
I don’t know about you, but when I was struggling with anxiety on a daily basis, waking up with knots in my stomach, and feeling depleted and drained, I just wanted it to stop immediately.
The worst part was that my anxiety was giving me even MORE anxiety because I was worried about my physical health and losing business clients as I knew I was not 100% present for them.
Until I stopped buying into conventional methodology and trusting my craft, I kept spinning in these 5 myths.
You can “talk” and “think” your way out of anxiety.
This looks like enrolling in a coaching or counseling process where you talk, talk, express, talk, and talk some more. You process your thoughts and feelings, yes.
It certainly is helpful to get your thoughts in order, and maybe understand your feelings a bit better, but this just sets the stage for the next step which is DO-ING.
You actually have to act differently, and make different choices to get rid of anxiety successfully.
Because thoughts —-> emotion —-> action, starting with thoughts is great. But it’s only the first step in the process.
Also, try “thinking” your way out of having panic attacks. You can have the greatest intentions of not experiencing physical distress, but I it still happens without warning.
Anxiety happens TO you. WRONG!
There is no outside force or entity inflicting anxiety ON you. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but the source of anxiety is within you.
Please don’t confuse “source” with “reason”. There is a reason that you are experiencing anxiety, we are talking the root cause here. But that reason lives within you, and you actually hold the answer.
This is why others can share how THEY beat anxiety, but if you try the same solutions, you don’t get the same results.
And think about it, if anxiety happens TO you, then you are in a helpless state to do anything about it. This is a useless energy and feeling (victimization) to carry around.
Anxiety will dissipate with time. You know, “time heals all wounds”.
If you go back to myth #1, I talk about how talking and expressing feeling sets the stage, but DO-ING is imperative.
I call this the comfort myth. Wouldn’t it be nice if time would just fix all our problems?
It’s an easy solution. It’s safe. Sure it might take awhile, but we really don’t need to worry about failing, doing anything different, or making it worse. Time will just show up and wa-la, anxiety is vaporized!
I am not sure I want to count on time either because time isn’t all that specific. If time decides to work it’s magic at say, age 86, I know I would not want to live with anxiety for another 40 years. No thanks!
If you meditate on it, you will figure out the cause of your anxiety. It will come to you.
I love meditation. It really grounds me and helps me gain clarity in thought. However, I can only think and act based on my current reality, what’s in my awareness.
If I have subconscious beliefs driving my bus, or a repeated, unhelpful pattern that actually originated in a past-life, no amount of meditating will bring this information to light.
There is a reason why we have a subconscious… it’s self-protection.
There is a reason why we don’t remember all our past-life conundrums… we have enough shit to deal with in THIS lifetime, don’t need even more overwhelm.
What you meditate on, is only that which is in your current awareness. Beating anxiety requires a digging up of the stuff you CAN’T see.
There is a single technique or tool you can use to eliminate anxiety.
I’ve seen Tapping (EFT) courses, and yes, I LOVE Tapping. I use it myself and with my clients.
I know NLP practitioners that focus on shifting mindset and beliefs about anxiety.
Therapists use cognitive behavioral, or exposure techniques to resolve anxiety.
So yes, there are great tools out there. However, to believe that a single tool can provide a whole solution sets you up to re-experience anxiety again.
Let me ask you, can you build an entire house with a hammer?
Plus, if you don’t know the REAL reason you feel anxious, you have zero idea as to what are the BEST tools to use. Usually it’s a combination of the “right” techniques that will work best for you.
A More Comprehensive And Effective Solution
By not subscribing to any of the myths above, you will be one step ahead of most when it comes to getting rid of anxiety.
I wish I could say that there is a magic wand that will magically make anxiety, tension, worry, and nervousness go away, but there isn’t.
However, there IS a solution that is way more quick and efficient than the conventional routes, and that can tell you exactly WHY you are stressed and anxious which is half the battle! Once you are in an empowered position of knowledge, clarity, and understanding, you can totally DO something about it, getting rid of it for good.