Most people don’t go after what they really want. Why? Because it can be unpopular or scary (to name a few), and they don’t have the confidence to withstand the heat from others or the requirement to step out of their comfort zone.
I have written a few blog posts before chronicling my own issues of lacking the confidence to do things I wanted to do or that I knew felt right to me, so I am not going to rehash that. Rather, I would like to get down to the nitty-gritty and present some of the challenges that come with going after what you want.
1. It requires you to follow YOUR intuition, what your soul voice is telling you, and others won’t get it or even support it.
What usually happens is you tell your partner, your parent, your colleague, your friend, that you are being called to do _________________. And you get something that sounds like this…
- Yea, but what about…?
- Are you sure that….?
- How could you give up…?
- Think about this logically, though…
- You really have it good…
- You don’t want to hurt ____________, do you?
I myself have been told the following:
- to get my head out of the clouds
- that my intuition isn’t really telling me what I think it is telling me
- that my gut is wrong
- that I am being selfish
- that the grass isn’t greener on the other side
- you must be having a mid-life crisis
The reality is being able to stand your ground takes a great deal of PERSONAL POWER, and FAITH in yourself. Your decisions are going to impact others, and you won’t always get the support you are looking for. That’s just life.
2. It requires you to deal with your fears about change and to step into roles that are outside your comfort zone. These fears live in your subconscious, and they will sabotage you over and over again in the form of…
- fear-based monkey mind chatter
- somatic symptoms (anxiety, headaches, stomach aches, pain in the body, etc.)
- perceived “laziness”
Getting past these ancient brain, self-preservation blocks requires the use of TOOLS that can get past your armor and reach your inner dialogue. This is why I use Tapping in my coaching practice, EMDR in my therapy practice, and A LOT of visualization and mindset activities.
3. It requires WORK. It is HARD. And if you give up easily, then you won’t ever get what you want.
You will need to be OK with failing, and trying different strategies or approaches when things don’t work out as planned. This also takes a great deal of CONFIDENCE and inner knowing that you are on the right path regardless.
4. It requires you to know WHY you are going after what you want. Your dreams need to be YOUR dreams, not those of your partner, your parent, your colleague, society, or your friend.
If you don’t have a strong commitment to your goals, then you will easily talk yourself out of moving forward. One of the initial assessments I do with my clients is to investigate their WHY. Why do you want this? How do you know? What does it look like in the end?
I have actually turned clients away when their “why” is attached to something outside of themselves, and they are unwilling to address the issue, because I know we will end up spinning in circles.
5. It may unintentionally hurt others, and you will be required to have some difficult conversations.
Uncomfortable feelings will arise:
This happens in the forms of breakups, whether it be a personal relationship or work partnership, as well as just changes within the established dynamics of the home, a friendship, or the workplace.
There is usually a grieving process that comes with this particular step.
Again, a strong core and staying in alignment with your authentic self will help you to effectively communicate your needs and process your feelings.
The ultimate truth is that you are CAPABLE, and actually do have the CONFIDENCE to to follow your dreams.
But if you find yourself trapped in any of the above 5 scenarios, then you are just not tapping into your personal power and soul voice.
Are you ready to go after what you want? Tell me about it! Schedule a free phone consult with me as I would love to help you on your journey to greater confidence and following your dreams.